The Masks That We Wear (Also My Facebook Wellness Giveaway Details!)

"We all wear masks - metaphorically speaking."
- Ben Stein as Dr. Arthur Neuman in "The Mask"

In psychology, we learn that humans tend to show different sides of themselves to different people or groups of people (which is a good thing - we don't want to be so indiscreet that we share the same things we'd tell our closest and dearest friends with, say, our insurance brokers.)

While we remain ourselves at the core, there are situations in which we intuitively know or feel that it is either okay or inappropriate to share a part of ourselves.  We tend to share more with people we trust and hold back when with people we don't (or in situations that require us to present ourselves academically or professionally.)

This is true of all human beings, including famous figures such as Marilyn Monroe. Marilyn is a great example of the masks theory.  She presented herself as a sexy vixen, full of confidence and glamour. Yet in her death, we learned that underneath the alter ego of Marilyn, there was a woman by the name of Norma Jean Baker, who many say was a vulnerable, insecure, and at times emotionally unstable.

She is quoted as having said: "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."

I thought of Marilyn today after I caught myself uttering insecurities galore.  Since I write about self-confidence, love, and acceptance, one of my coworkers found it quite curious that I would say such things when I present so much differently through my Sulilo persona.   I am truly grateful that she said something.

It really made me think, and I want to share this:

I am on this road along side of you.  This journey is life-long (and for most of us numerous life-times long), and I surely have not mastered the arts of self-confidence, self-love, or self-acceptance. In fact, I consider much of my writing to be a reflection of my own vulnerabilities as well as love letters to myself and to any other soul with which my messages resonate.  Many times, the topic of my blog will spring from a personal experience or observation, and I write as if I were my own best friend and were going through the same situation. What would I say?

My intention is to tune into Source, to Life, and my Heart when I present you with various topics and discussions. May you be blessed and take from it what you need.  May you remember that none among us is perfect - not even the biggest self-help Guru on the planet.  We are all on this road together.

Namaste.

The Tarot As A Self-Empowerment Tool - Tap Into Your True Desires, Needs, and Dreams

Most of us have heard of or perhaps have even seen the Rorschach test - a psychological test created by Hermann Rorschach in 1921. It is simply ink blots, spilled onto a piece of paper that is then folded, unfolded and then left to dry.  The images are shown to patients to get them to encourage them to reveal their thought processes.  What do you see when you look at this image?  There are so many possibilities, its endless. What do your interpretations say about you, and how can this type of work be helpful in solving the problems that we face? 

Many people turn to a tool that can be thought of in a similar way as the Rorschach test - the Tarot deck. People often turn to the Tarot because they are dealing with an issue with which they would like better insight or clarity. They hope that by consulting with someone who can read the cards, they will have their future foretold and guidance given. I do not doubt that some human beings have this incredible gift to read tarot cards and tap into the future, but in my personal experience, I've grown to believe in another way to use the cards as a way of experiencing self-empowerment.

This past year, I was received training on how to intuitively read cards by certified hypnotherapist and Tarot reader and teacher Susan Gold.  If you are ever in the San Francisco Bay area and have an interest in hypnotherapy, long-term hypnotherapy counseling, or tarot, I can only tell you that my experiences with Susan have been magnificent. She taught me so much through our hypnotherapy and Tarot sessions, and I absolutely adore her as a person.

Susan teaches the use of the Tarot as a self-empowerment tool, and now, so do I.  What this means is that you can read your own cards whenever you have a question. And, instead of feeling a sense that the answers are outside of you, you begin to realize the oracle within - that you have all of the answers and tools within yourself to help guide you in the right direction.  The Universe designed each and every one of us this way.  When you read your own cards, once you allow any doubts and insecurities about your "ability" to subside (we ALL can do this!), you will begin to tap into your higher self, the collective consciousness, and to Source in order to figure out what it is that you really want and need.

An important part of using the Tarot as a self-empowerment tool is to phrase your questions in ways that empower you, not in ways that dis-power you. This part took me a while to get the hang of, and Susan reassured me that this is pretty common.

Let's come up with a question for you, right now, and I'll do some examples.

Instead of asking questions that require a specific date, i.e. "When will I meet my soul mate?", rephrase your question to "What do I need to know in order to open my life up for my soul mate?" Here is an appropriate opportunity to make it all about you.

A couple of other examples: Instead of asking "When will I figure out what I want to do with my life/career/relationship?", ask "What can I do to help realize and manifest the best situation for my highest good and all those involved in my life/career/relationship?"

"Is my significant other cheating on me?" would be rephrased to empower you, as "What do I need to know about my current relationship?"

So, go ahead. Think of a question. Work on it for a few minutes until you've rephrased it in such a way that it puts the responsibility back on you to do the footwork and to tap into your own inner voice to search for the answers and guidance.

Once you have your question formulated, take a look at the Tarot card below.

In a journal or any paper that you have handy, begin to record your immediate thoughts, observations, and feelings about the image.  Let it be a free flow of writing - any thoughts that come to mind and any stories about what is happening in the picture should be recorded. Once you feel like you've captured your thoughts around this image, begin to tell a story about the image while answering the question you formulated.  You will be amazed at how much wisdom, insight, and compassion that you have right within your own heart and as a result of your connection to all of life.

May you realize that there is no greater power than that which resides right in your very own heart - that you are a child of the Universe, worthy of good things. May you realize that you are tapped in to the Universal Wisdom, and that you have all the tools that you need to make decisions, right inside of you.

Please feel encouraged to share what YOU see in the image above.

Namaste,
Debbie aka Sulilo