A few things occured to me today. These things have occured to me before, but the ego is so clever that its only a matter of time before the unconsciousness sets in and there's a reminder. It happens to everyone. Here is what occurred to me:
1.) It's not about me.
2.) It's not about me.
3.) It's not about me.
There are other ways to put this: The world doesn't revolve around me...that has nothing to do with me...I'm not THAT important...you get the drift. In the theater of the mind, we are always the star.
But, today I became fully satisfied with the fact that, all at once, I was incredibly aware of how much of my own self-worth and confidence was coming from my perceptions of how I thought everyone around me perceived me.
All at once, I grew overwhelmingly wary of my own endless attempts to please people accordingly - habitually reading them and feeling the need to meet their needs, then getting resentful when it eventually exhausts me and there is no reciprocation (nor should I expect it!).
Other people have their own stories. They have their own issues going on. I understand this, because it is true of me too. From now on, if someone is rude to me, I will bless them, but I will not be a doormat either. I will remember that I am a child of the Universe, that whatever situation, circumstance, or interaction I am in is just a passing breeze in the Eternity of time, and that everything has its place, purpose, and is transient. I will create a protective space around me that does not allow others' "stuff" to invade my cheerful spirit in a negative way.
I will no longer ride the emotional roller coaster of always worrying if I've upset someone even though I know I am kindhearted and wouldn't intentionally do this. I will stop apologizing for every little thing unnecessarily.
I will remember that everything is on a ebb and flow cycle, just like the tide...
Busyness verses boring times
Laughter and tears
Last night I took 30 minutes of Savasana, and it was heavenly. Even though the monkey mind was quite relentless, I definitely felt a significant improvement in my overall mood and clarity today compared with yesterday. It was worth it, and I deserve it. And so do you.
May you remember that you are precious and whole, and that no matter how much someone else tries to rain on your parade, you are still precious and whole, worthy, and blessed. May you remember that in order to take care of anyone else or serve in any capacity, you must first take care yourself - and it's NOT selfish.
Think of the airplane mask analogy. You must secure your mask first so you don't pass out - or else how would you then put the other mask on your loved one?
It is your responsibility to care for your temple (body), your mind, and your Spirit as is me. It is wise to Love yourself. From this place, we find and live in balance. Only then can we truly give to others from a place of purity.
Debbie aka Sulilo